Crazy

When we broke up I told you it was over and I meant it. You said that was a lie. I did not believe you. But when you proved to me that you could not let it go I grew wise quickly. The calls never stopped but only grew. It grew so sever I could not look at my phone for nervousness. Lisa grew so sick by it she answered and told you to stop. Just to stop. There was no answer. It did not matter. You kept calling. Only by then you had grown wise as well, only calling when you knew I was alone. “A cute game of cat and mouse”, you’d whisper over the phone late at night when I was too blind with sleep and tears to see who called. Your hot breath I felt through the phone against my skin. All those times you stood outside my window. All those times I knew you were there. I wished for that street light to burn out so that maybe you should leave. But then I feared not being able to keep track of you in the night, to be sure you weren’t sneaking up on me in the dark. You say this is love. Cut that out. This is not love. When did you change to thinking that way? It’s disturbing to know I was once with a person like you. This has to stop… your eyes that are constantly watching me even when I am certain I am alone.

 

No, I do not want you. I am not sure I ever did. 

It drives me crazy that you have gone crazy. Leave me alone.

 

Now, “deary”, it’s time for you to feel. Time for you to feel fear. To feel eyes against your skin. Always followed. You will feel my torture. The pain you have caused me I will pay back tenfold. I will make you regret ever choosing me as your obsession. All your promises, lies, every command you gave me I will throw back into your face until you break. But even that will not be enough. After I have dumped your body I will forget all about you. Quite quickly to be honest. You see, this love you always spoke of never really existed between the two of us. I can’t imagine where you even got that idea. I will be able to walk down the streets and not hear your footsteps matching mine oh so carefully. Begging will not save you now. Don’t even try. The wisest will survived this game. I will be separated from you. This bullet represents every woman who has ever lost sleep for fear of who would be standing over her when she awoke. For every woman who has ever been abused by the man who forced himself into her life. For every woman who has been unable to stand up for herself until now and forever more. May this be a warning to you and yours. Goodbye.

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